My own life has developmental seasons like yours - from childhood to adulthood, from career inklings to career realization, from a calling to a choice, from initiation to fruition, from relational beginnings to endings, from innocence to maturity, from health to illness, from anticipation to retrospection, from who I was then to who I am now.  Our roles and responsibilities are time-related - time that comes and goes.

As thanatologists, we know grieving and time are inextricably woven.  A recent blog post from The Center for Prolonged Grief captures Amy Cuzzola-Kern’s voice as she describes “what I didn’t realize then was that this one minute, of all the minutes in my life, would start me on a path – a twisty, meandering track – of grief, change and, eventually, yes, hope.”   

Maya Angelou once said “since time is the one immaterial object which we cannot influence – neither speed up nor slow down, add to nor diminish – it is an imponderably valuable gift.”   Black History Month allows us a time-oriented perspective on the African-American experience (click here: Black History Month). The gift of time enables us to gauge our forward movement, our inertia, our repetitive backslides. History provides lessons and learnings if we pay attention. History can inform and connect our past, present, and future. 

ADEC has been enriched by a growing understanding of the cross-generational trauma and grieving endured by African-Americans. I urge us to be attentive to the lessons provided in times when ADEC made advances and other times when we acted in ways that thwarted progress and created unsafe space.  ADEC can look back at our history and evaluate our understanding, bias and empathy toward others who live amidst imposed adversity and discrimination. We can reflect around our place in the making of this history by asking how we contribute to the writing of the cultural narrative and how we contribute to the righting of that same cultural story. 

Tashel Bordere and Jennifer Matthews gave us a provoking and powerful video in 2020 addressing racial injustice, loss, and grief in the Black community.  I encourage you to watch this on our website. They say that “we must continue unpacking the diverse, lived layers of loss in the Black experience…the health and death disparities…the race specific layers of responses and coping… generational inequity that contextualizes the reality of loss overload…the patterns of recurrence”.  These patterns can evoke deep anger, helplessness, and sometimes apathy and hopelessness for African-Americans.

Consider the pre-COVID to COVID to post-COVID world: our parameters on time; our confusion and distortion of where we currently are; our hopes of what will change; our patience or impatience with the mysteries of timing.    Within ADEC we are emerging from the time of the “virtual only” pandemic world to something new. We are hosting a hybrid conference this year. We are returning to an in-person gathering, our first since 2019, while also offering virtual options.  We have the opportunity to embrace each other again, to invest time together in a connection that nurtures and nourishes us!  I encourage you to make your plans to join us April 20^th – 23^rd in St. Louis.  We have enacted safety protocols to permit us to engage without worry. I hope you will find reassurance and commitment to your health and well-being.

In addition to the events highlighted by our Conference Committee Chair, Fay Green, you will experience special events such as our celebration of the 3^rd edition of the Handbook of Thanatology with co-editors, Heather Servaty-Seib and Helen Chapple.  We will host the Diversity & Inclusion Reception with Tashel Bordere’s inspiring message about where we have been and where we are headed as diverse ADEC members.  Phillip Garrett will share creative glimpses at our organizational history and its connection to our present and our future through ADEC’s Legacy Project.  Additionally, the Students & New Professionals Committee will host a Virtual Wellness Hour as a fund-raiser to support scholarships & awards.

I am excited for the St. Louis opportunity and I urge you to take advantage of the early bird registration that extends through March 22^nd! Please come if you are able! Registration is for in-person or virtual participation. 

In closing, Rep. John Lewis said “take a long, hard look down the road you will have to travel once you have made a commitment to work for change…change often takes time”.  Make this ADEC’s time. Let’s make a difference together!

Do you have a mentor/role model who has significantly affected your career path in thanatology? Tell us why you chose this career path.

When I first came to ADEC, I met Dr. Ronald Barrett.  This was the first time I met a person of color who openly and unapologetically discussed barriers to dying/death and end‑of‑life discussions in the African American community with solutions. While this topic is often discussed, there is usually not a solution provided.

My personal experience of having two infant deaths and little communal support; especially from my faith community, prompted me to provide this care for others. Dr. Barrett’s constant encouragement prompted me to pursue advanced education and to share my personal experiences of grief and loss. Unfortunately, he died before I could let him know that I went on to complete a doctoral program. He is actually buried in the cemetery near my mother‑in‑law in South Carolina. Whenever I visit her grave, I visit his grave and let him know of my accomplishments and give him thanks.

I would encourage junior professionals to continue attending workshops and conferences sponsored by ADEC and their members. I would encourage them to get involved and even attend workshop/classes which are not in their comfort zone. If you are a researcher, attend workshops on other disciplines such as music and art therapy. There really is a connection between research and practice.

What do you think the future holds for your work and that of others like you? How will that impact what you do?

I believe that those of us who lift the voices of marginalized persons will allow those voices to be amplified leading to more than cultural sensitivity, but inclusion as well.

Describe how the role of being an ADEC member has been beneficial to you in your professional and / or personal life.

For those that are not familiar with the word “thanatology,’ that word alone becomes a conversation starter. Once the conversation is started, I talk freely about those issues which are not openly discussed. For those who are familiar with thanatology, they are quite impressed as they know that credential demonstrates knowledge and superior experience in the field.

I have encouraged my students and those new to the field to stay with and reach out to ADEC. The experts in the field are willing to share their knowledge and are also willing to listen to the lived experience others. I also encourage those who may feel marginalized to connect and share their stories. By sharing stories, other begin to understand and if not understand, this can begin a dialogue.

I cherish those relationships that I have made with ADEC. The senior members in the field (those which students often quote) are more than willing to share their expertise if asked; a phenomenal resource. 

Do you have a mentor/role model who has significantly affected your career path in Thanatology? Tell us why you chose this career path.

I have been fortunate to have two esteemed mentors thus far in my career: Dr. Bob Neimeyer and Dr. An Hooghe. They have supported me in many ways, but most importantly they have been an inspirational example of balancing clinical work, research, and teaching.

I believe death and loss are catalysts for change. These painful events invite each of us to examine the complexity of life's purpose and, in the vulnerable space of grief, people are often more open to redefining self. Although I originally set out to be a child psychologist, I found myself drawn to systemic therapy where people and "problems" are understood in the context of relationships. This perspective has largely shaped my view of grief as a relational process.

What advice would you offer a more junior professional in the field on growing their career or keeping their work fresh?

I am seeing some important shifts in academia and in thanatology, one of which is interdisciplinary collaboration. I believe junior professionals should strive to establish both mentor and peer relationships with those outside of their field of practice. I am grateful for the classes I have taken with non clinical track graduate students from a range of backgrounds including family studies, human development, financial planning, education, and sociology. Their perspectives have added tremendous value to the way I approach research and clinical practice.

What do you think the future holds for your work and that of others like you? How will that impact what you do?

The future holds many opportunities to explore the relational meaning making processes of grief. I would like to expand what we know about interpersonal meaning making to non death losses in the family including immigration. I also hope to research more about meaning making between siblings. We tend to focus on couples and parent child relationships, but siblings are an essential sub system in the family that is in need of more attention. 

ADEC Members’ Corner  is a regular column in ADEC Connects that highlights one or more members’ activity as an ADEC professional. Members’ Corner is open for contributions from all ADEC members; to be included, please send your article to Amanda Brace or Beverly Rollins.

Connects is interested in your thoughts and work. Please reach out to us with content submissions, suggestions or ideas.

For consideration in the next issue of Connects please submit your ideas/content by Thursday, March 31.

Contact Us
Editor – Amanda Brace Ed.S, LSC, PCC-S
Assistant Editor – Beverly Rollins BSW, MGA, MA